My laptop is broken, after only a few minor taps with my coffee cup! The other day I turned on my laptop just to quickly check my email , a quick event so I still had time to go to town……….so I thought? I turned it on and sipped my coffee waiting to get started. I hadnt turned it on in a week so expected a bit of mail, what I got was……..A windows update that just had to reboot my machine before anything else happened. Then after a reboot, the antivirus decided it was time to update in its entirety, another reboot, followed by its normal virus update, during this, various programs that sneak into your life via computer turn on all suffering update withdrawals, there was Adobe, and my firewall and the anti malware program and a few that didnt have names and they all wanted to reboot!!! Fifteen reboots later and I was feeling a little miffed and was gently goading the computer to step on it with my coffee cup, an hour had passed! My email was finally opening, and fiftythree adds for viagra, penis enlargement and the odd porn flick and no mail for me, sorry mailbox full ! My normally placid demeanor began to overheat with my tapping with the cup turning to frustration and obsession. And a downtown appointment looming, no, passing! Finally I found myself with a broken coffee cup, a broken screen and a slightly malformed keyboard……….and……..NO MAIL! My wife wont let me near her laptop, woe is me what can I do!